I volunteer with a bereavement support group. One topic that garners alot of discussion each year is handling the holidays.
Those who are facing the first holiday season after a loss face many emotions. Some want to continue their celebrations as they have alway been, but worry that they can't replicate celebrations of the past. Others want to make things as different as possible, but may feel guilt at leaving traditions behind.
As with all facets of grieving, there is no one answer that works for everyone. Perhaps this first year, you may keep a few trraditions going and let others lie dormant for a year or two. Maybe you never start them back up or maybe you replace them with something new.
When my mother's Alzheimers progressed to the point at which she could no longer bake Christmas cookies, I began making a couple of her recipes. It has been more than 12 years since that happened. I am still a reluctant baker. I put off doing the baking as long as possible, but, in the end, I am always glad that I do it.
Thoughts and prayers go out to everyone remembering a lost loved one this holiday season.